Entry tags:
Eridan: Pick up a hooker named Linda.
[ We start our story from a view of an apartment door, followed with some rather ornery chortling from the background. Suddenly the world is spinning as if you're on a circus ride, and you get a nice shot of Eridan's butt chin mug. He looks a little confused and you'll soon see why.]
hey lady you look kind of cold you should get on more clothes
do you want our shirts?
theyre free
you could havve them
[The view whips around again, Eridan is removing his gray shirt and lo ho ho dear readers, there is a lady. A lady with that is dressed in scanty clothes. Her name is none other than Linda. Also known on the street as the Hegemon of Honeybadgers. She looks disturbed, or amused being surrounded by all the troll children. Also, note that the DISCEDO KGB are no where to be seen.
But LO AND BEHOLD, ERIDAN HAS SCORED A PROSTITUTE.
BEACHES AND SHORES.]
hey lady you look kind of cold you should get on more clothes
do you want our shirts?
theyre free
you could havve them
[The view whips around again, Eridan is removing his gray shirt and lo ho ho dear readers, there is a lady. A lady with that is dressed in scanty clothes. Her name is none other than Linda. Also known on the street as the Hegemon of Honeybadgers. She looks disturbed, or amused being surrounded by all the troll children. Also, note that the DISCEDO KGB are no where to be seen.
But LO AND BEHOLD, ERIDAN HAS SCORED A PROSTITUTE.
BEACHES AND SHORES.]

ACTION // FORWARD DATED to be the last post that happens.
ii2 that recordiing?
oh my god.
ERIIDAN YOU ARE 2O FUCKIING 2TUPIID!
2HUT IIT OFF!
2HUT IIT OFF 2HUT IIT OFF!!
[Sollux then punches Eridan in the face, grabs hold of his communicator-like device, and forces it off.]
ACTION // FORWARD DATED ;o;
[Kind of, having a nose bleed here.]
ACTION // FORWARD DATED
oh my god.
we have two get out of here.
they're goiing two know where we are.
we are 2o fucked.
you ju2t fucked u2 all over and not even iin the way you'd liike.
oh my god.
ACTION // FORWARD DATED
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apparently a2kiing you two be LE22 of a faiilure ii2 ju2t two much two a2k for.
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whatever.
get the other2.
we need two get out of here, now.
ACTION // FORWARD DATED
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you don't even remotely gra2p the 2iituatiion, do you?
oh my god you are more fuckiing braiindead than gz.
ACTION // FORWARD DATED
[He is going to punch you where they probably drained blood Sollux.]
ACTION // FORWARD DATED
[Andddd punched.]
fuck- OK THAT'2 IIT.
[ABSOLUTELY NO HOLDS BARRED, JUST PUNCHING ERIDAN TO THE GROUND.]
JU2T DO EVERYONE HERE A FAVOR: 2TAY DOWN, AND 2HUT UP.
[Gosh, that sounds a lot like some major hatred there.]
ACTION // FORWARD DATED
[Eridan is pulverized to the ground with Sollux's punches, and they rather hurt. A lot.]
[And Eridan just kicks and fights back against Sollux. Can't you just smell the hatred brewing in their coffee pots?]
ACTION // FORWARD DATED
ii'm 2eriiou2.
ju2t 2hut up.
ii need two check the network for 2ome place for u2 two go.
ACTION // FORWARD DATED
[He's holding the red tape around his arm while raising his arm up, to stop the bleeding again.]
ACTION // FORWARD DATED
[derp derp, browsing current events, maps, etc...
... a ... party...?
Oh god, it's by that guy he talked to once and he had to hang up on him. SKIPPING OVER THAT.]
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